Condo Christmas

The gray, cold, windy beach and surf outside our view filled condo made a perfect cozy retreat for a fun family Christmas. We couldn't get all four kids' families to join us, but we had a very special time with the St. Augustine contingent.

We laughed our butts off watching what could only be visiting Canadians building sand castles and frolicking in the frigid surf. It was 45 degrees out! And windy! The middle picture above shows a warmly dressed mother making 5 bathing suit clad children pose for a photo op. Brrr.

We, by we I mean I, were positive that Panama City Beach would be partying on Christmas eve. Au Contraire. After calling almost every restaurant in the yellow pages and having no luck, we finally found Dirty Dick's Crab House open for dinner. Turns out the food was better than good and our service very attentive. We had a terrific time there & will go back at some future date.

Christmas day we pretty much vegged. I did an oven ready ham dinner and between me & DD Danielle,we had desserts out the wazoo to choose from.

The following day was movie day. Pier Park has a new 16 theater multiplex with comfy stadium seating. We were divided on what to see, but that was no problem. We just split up between Robert Downey, Jr in Sherlock Holmes and George Clooney in Up In The Air. It was the first movie in an actual theater that DH & I had seen since Christmas 2008. We don't get out much.

But...plans are already underway for next year. We're thinking we'd like to try Savannah again. We were there several years ago and just loved it.

Tomorrow is New Year's Eve and it's also a rare blue moon, which I take to be very auspicious. So when I wish everyone a happy and prosperous new year, I truly believe it will happen.

Happy New Year!

Redneck Christmas Parade

Dang! I'm sorry I missed this one, so here below reprinted without permission is the descriptive article by Tony Simmons, On Line Editor of the Panama City News Herald.

It was just about the perfect way to complete a Christmas season vacation, and considering we missed the Panama City Jaycees parade for the first time in a decade, I was glad to be there for the annual Chumuckla Redneck Christmas Parade.

These photos (note from Michele: I only printed one), don't even do the event justice. Thousands showed up and lined County Road 192 in Santa Rosa County on Sunday, and the rain held off long enough for the hour-long procession and then some. The participants included tractors, mud-covered pickups, trailers, floats, boats, stock cars, horses, buggies, 18-wheelers, and more.

They threw Mardi Gras beads, Twinkies, packs of crackers, Slim Jims, Skoal cans, chicken feed, pecans wrappen in aluminum foil, and other things-including actual candy. One float passed with a barbecue grill going, and a woman tossed chicken hot off the grill into the crowd.

Men carried spit cups. They played musical instruments made of bed pans. They wore wigs, bad "teeth," and camouflage-lots and lots of camo. One float had a tent marked "redneck resort." A couple featured tree stands, and a couple of others featured Santas in camo sitting on old toilets instead of "thrones." There was a fake outhouse on one float, and an actual port-a-potty on another.

Decor included garland made of beer cans, a Rudolph strung up for harvesting (complete with red streamers coming from it's belly), misspelled signs, granny panties with the words "naughty" or "nice" written on them. Children wore antlers on ropes around their necks.

I hope you can see the humor in all of this. Everyone had a great time, laughing at themselves and the cultural stereotypes and no doubt thumbing their noses at anyone who just isn't in on the joke.

Michele again: I would never approve of mocking the true meaning of Christmas, but Rudolph is fair game...get it...fair game.

Too Cold for a Christmas Parade?

I was watching an "Alabama" Christmas music special this evening and saw that a Jaycee Christmas parade was coming on the same station right after the concert.

I love community parades. There's nothing more american, endearing or amusing. Besides, I 'm a past president of a Jaycee-ette chapter myself, so I'm gonna watch this. Since there was no mention of the location of the parade, I thought it might be out of Nashville. But it turns out this parade is actually in Panama City tonight.

I tuned in to hear two local TV "personalities" doing the commentary and the first thing I hear is "Oh, this must be the coldest night in the parade's 52 year history." They're whining, "It's 44 degrees out here & we're freezing." I went outside to double check. OK, it's 44 degrees, no wind, balmy, beautiful. As a matter of fact, there's a gorgeous crescent moon in a clear sky. Maybe just a tad warm for the Christmas season, but then again, you never know what you're gonna get in December in Florida.

Wow, these TV "personalities" are telling me how lucky I am to be watching the parade from the comfort of my home. Let's send them to NYC to sit through the Macys Christmas parade or how about the Mummers parade on New Year's Day in Philly. Jeez, what a couple of wusses.

As I finish this up, a guest who just checked into #6 came to ask me how to turn on the heat. Is everyone nuts around here? This is great sleeping weather. Open the windows!

Southwest to PC

This is big news for this area. Southwest Airlines is going to begin nonstop flights at reasonable rates from Panama City to Baltimore-Washington, Houston, Nashville and Orlando. Service begins May 2010. This surely means more tourism, more business and more economic growth for the Florida panhandle. Bring it on!



We've been pretty busy around here the last couple of days and that's a good thing for December. It's mostly been workers, but I had a couple of my regular fishermen in room #8. Bill H and Bill B are good customers both around my age. They're friendly guys who come to Port St Joe fishing several times a year.

Well, here I am sitting in the office last night & on my security camera, I see Bill H hauling the microwave from his room into the lobby area. "Hey Michele, can you show a guy how to work this thing," he says. I suggest that we take it back to his room and plug it in so I can see what buttons he's managed to push to screw the thing up in the first place.

We approach the door to #8 and Bill H says, "Go on in, it's OK." I open the door and here's Bill B bent over the bed wearing nothing but his tightie whities. Now, I'm not fazed by this, but poor Bill B grabs his pants and dashes into the bathroom, while I get the microwave working again.

I don't know which Bill was more embarrassed, the one who carted his microwave to the office or the one caught in his skivvies, but the whole thing gave me a chuckle. Can't wait 'til your next visit guys.

Cristmas Wrapped Up

All the wrapping is done, out of state gifts mailed, on their way and today I'm delivering our veteran's bag of goodies.

Every year we adopt a disabled vet and do our best to fill his Chistmas wish list. We are told the first name, last initial and branch of service. Ours has been navy for the last several years & I must admit that buying navy blue hoodies and Old Spice was getting a little boring.

This year, our guy is Danny H., navy. Yes, he wanted his navy blue hoodie, but forgot to put down his size and in my mind's eye I saw Danny H. as a wiry little guy. However, one never knows, so we went with an xtra large hoodie. Then things got more interesting. He asked for action films on DVD & I found a couple of good ones. His request for dark chocolate and Folger's hazelnut coffee added a little dimension to his personality and were easy to find.

The final item on his list just ain't gonna happen. Sorry sailor, I don't buy cigarettes for anyone.

Merry Christmas and today is a great day to quit smoking.

Quick Hop to St Augustine

DS Nick and lovely family were passing through St. Augustine for just a day and since I haven't seen them in a year, I made the quick hop, if you can call 5 1/2 hours in the pouring rain a quick hop, over there for a little visit.

Of course that entailed a "quick hop" back again the next morning. This time 5 1/2 hours in dense fog. Totally worth it though. We had a great visit before the Vitola clan packed up & headed back to NJ.

I generally find driving long distances very relaxing. The rain & fog just served to keep me awake. No auto pilot this time.

I took along an audio book as I usually do. For 3 hours on the trip over, dead bodies kept turning up. In the closet, behind the bed, in the trunk of a car. And on the return trip, the bodies kept coming and although eventually the murders were solved, I don't think I'll nominate this one for a Nobel prize in literature. Good thing I drive an old car. By mistake, I bought cassettes instead of CDs.

When I wasn't listening to the book, I amused myself by cursing out the other drivers on the road who must all have been on leave from the nursing home. No offense intended. Yeah, right.

More Manatee

Here's one of the boats belonging to the manatee wranglers. Oh, that's their van also. Before the evening was over, we had 11 federal and state employees, two boats, the van and 5 other vehicles all here to rescue one manatee.

Since these folks operate on our tax dime, I couldn't help but picture those road crews we see with one guy working and 7 more standing around scratching their asses.

Happy ending though. The big guy was safely on his way back to Tampa by early afternoon.

Manatee Rescue

The Florida Integrated Science Center has a group staying here at the Dixie Belle tonight. Their mission is to round up a misguided manatee who wandered west into cold water and needs to be relocated to warmer waters near Tampa where they hope to raise his dangerously low body temp. They know the body temp and location from his attached id tag.

There are only 2500 manatees left in the US and their only predator is man, so we are pretty much responsible for the survival of the species which originated 25-40 million years ago. The majority of their injuries and deaths are caused by damage done by outboard boat motors.

Susan, one of the scientists, told us that generally, manatees are pretty smart, but this guy not so much. He was in the Carribean & should have headed east into warm winter water but chose instead to head for the Dixie Belle Motel for Christmas. We'll invite him back for the summer months, but for now the rescue team needs to relocate him and warm him up.

It's a good thing that manatees have some smarts, 'cause they sure can't rely on their good looks.

Trailer Trash Christmas

Ho, Ho, Ho. Well, my Christmas decorations are up. Totally tacky & half-hearted. That's a major improvement over last year, which was no-hearted.

It's so hard to get in the holiday groove here in LA (lower Alabama, lest you forget.) Not having family or friends close by affects one's mood as well. On a positive note, I'll be driving over to St. Augustine next Saturday to hook up with Nick and family for one night while on their way home from a visit to Disney. Can you imagine dragging two kids around Disney World? Everyone knows it's a place for adults to play. As for me, I'd like to move into Walt's (Disney, that is) apartment over the shops on Main Street. But I digress.

We're actually going to have a real Christmas at the condo in PCB. We booked a 3 bedroom unit this time and Danielle, Ike & kids are driving over from St. Augustine to join us. We'll even put up a tree. I'm drying the ubiquitous backyard lemons(dried slices look like stained glass) and glittering seashells to use as ornaments plus wrapping tons of junk to put under the tree.

We'll be beachfront, but whatever the weather I'm planning lots of family fun and surprises. I'm thinking I may be going into this thing whole-hearted after all. One never knows, do one?

Bye Violet

She hated being shut up in the house. She hated her "fun tunnel." And one day last week she unzipped the fun tunnel and spent a couple of carefree hours exploring the great outdoors.

It made her so happy that I opened the doggie/cat door so she could come & go during daylight hours. When it started to get dark, I would find her, bring her inside & close the cat door.

Every day she came in regularly for food and lovin'. A couple of times she was out after dark and I could hear her cavorting on the roof of the trailer. Nevertheless, when I called she came. I closed the door & she seemed content to spend the evening cuddling with me.

Last night she came in early and I closed the door early. I went out to the laundry around 7 PM and when I opened the office door to come back in, she slipped by me & was out again. By this time it was stone dark.

I went out several times during the night calling her. Nothing. I told Dan to leave the cat door open until he came to bed. Nothing. This morning, nothing. No Violet. I was brushing my teeth when Dan came in to tell me she was dead in the road. Damn that stupid f***'in cat. I loved her. Damn her.

Shameless

I almost broke my arm patting myself on the back. These are two of the most beautiful pies I've ever seen and I made them myself. Pumpkin, I've made many times and for me it's a no fail deal, but here I am at this advanced age and it's is my first ever apple pie.

I guess I never made one because I don't really care for apple pie, but Dan put in a special request for Thanksgiving so I gave it a shot. It's so pretty, it's almost a shame to cut into it. Not! I already did. Had a piece for my dinner tonight. Pretty darn tasty. Since it's only me & Dan for Thanksgiving tomorrow, there will still be plenty of pie, so I think I'll have a piece of the pumpkin for dessert. Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Fun Run?

That's what it's called, but I'm not sure that Violet agrees with me.

Violet is an indoor cat who's always scheming & plotting new escape plans. She'll launch herself over the front desk at guests who, she is sure, will liberate her. We've had more than a few screams and heart-stopping when this 15lb hair ball comes flying through the air at people' heads.

My attempt to satisfy her craving for the great outdoors and all the interesting stuff out there was to provide her with a safe place to play. Hence, the Fun Run. It can be put anywhere. I can fill the attached weight bags to keep it stable on hard surfaces or use the included stakes for soft ground. The whole thing compacts into a flat carry bag about 20" square.

Today's the first day & I'm hearing a lot of whining & crying from out there on the deck. What's not to like? I'm sure if I was a cat, I'd be thrilled to be confined to a 10' mesh tunnel to nowhere, while birds, lizards, bugs and birds roam freely just out of reach.

When life gives you lemons

You see all those lemons? That's just one tree. We have two more trees & lemons coming out the butt. C'mon down here and pick some of these darn things or they're going to rot on the tree.

We keep a basketful on the front porch for folks to help themselves and Dan takes some down to the VFW, but an awful lot of them still go to waste.

Spent the day today converting the small kitchen unit into a non smoking room. We're now half & half. My goal is to be 100% non smoking. Dan's fighting me on this, but I'm determined. A couple of weeks ago we actually lost some business because we didn't have enough non smoking accomodations. On top of that, smokers burn holes in everything in the room. Who needs that aggravation? Not me.

We're going to have a couple of sloppy days due to tropical storm Ida, but I'm not complaining because this year's hurricane season pretty much didn't happen. The sun will be out by Thursday, so get your self on over here & pick some lemons!

An Exceptional Day

It was a really beautiful cool, dry morning, so I threw a sassy scarf around my neck, hoisted my new TJ Maxx bargain purse and set out for Panama City. I had no major agenda, so I hit a few of my favorite stores just to browse. Kirklands, Pier One, Bed Bath & Beyond and my new favorite World Market. What a treasure trove that place is. Picked up a few great bargains and got compliments on my excellent new purse.

Walmart was my last stop where I finished my Christmas shopping. On checking out the cashier asked me if I was having a good day. "I'm having an exceptional day," I said. I was having so much fun, I forgot to have lunch, so I parked in front of a sub shop (or what passes for one here in LA) and called DH to see if he wanted me to bring him a sub as well. "Oh yeah, great idea," he says, so I hit the lock button, hop out, slam the car door and lock my keys inside. Not that I noticed until I came back out with the sandwiches.

When I called Dan, he tried the remote with our cell phones trick, but apparently that doesn't work when you are 35 miles apart, so he closed up the motel & came to my rescue.

Apart from that little hiccup, I must say that it was indeed an exceptionally good day. I still have my totally excellent purse and I beat Dan home by almost 5 minutes. I'll bet he didn't even know we were racin'. Love that.

Cat Fence

It's been pretty darn dull around here with no business to speak of. On the up side the weather has turned from sullen and sultry to bright and crisp.

Perfect weather for cooking, so I whipped up one of our favs, a bacon and onion quiche. Now, those of you who have or have had cats know my dilemma. Where to put the thing to cool off. My Violet can get to just about every surface in the house. I usually stow things in the nuker, but hot out of the oven pie crust would get soggy in the enclosed space.

I did the only thing I could think of. My makeshift cat fence worked perfectly and the quiche, while not my best effort, was thoroughly enjoyed by everyone but the cat.

Rattlesnakes & Rattletraps

Photo #2 shows a shot of a rattler captured in DD Danielle's back yard yesterday.

When Callie the cat didn't return from her afternoon romp in the yard, Danielle went to investigate & found Callie frozen in fear facing a fat, four foot long rattler coiled to strike.

Son-in-law, Ike distracted the viper while waiting for local law enforcement to come and hopefully, blow the thing's head off. Uh, uh didn't happen. Dudley Doright apparently wasn't permitted to use deadly force. Instead, he offered to "relocate" the critter, so he & Ike wrangled the thing into the above metal trash can. I hope in the "relo" neighborhood that folks lock up their cats, small dogs and kids.

This weekend, Port St Joe High School was having a classless reunion. No wise guy, I don't mean only "no class" people could attend, but because it's such a small town the reunion was open to every graduate regardless of year. One of my guests was one of four remaining from the class of 1941. Another guest, who I'm estimating graduated somewhere around 1965 arrived driving the above pictured vintage Camaro. He had one of those honkin' loud mufflers on it and he was personally sporting a diamond in one ear lobe. I'm guessin' a really cool guy.

While I'm sipping my first cup of coffee this morning, he comes to the office to turn in his key. Shortly afterward, I hear the roar of the engine starting up & then Bam! The damn thing blew up & there were open flames under the front end. The driver hopped out over the flames & ran. DH Dan, grabbed a fire extinguisher & got to the car in time to put out the fire before the gas tank went up.

That muscled up engine is toast and the sad remains were flat-bedded away. Now there's a class reunion the guy will be talking about for years.

Big Whoop

Yeah, you're probably as impressed as I am. I spent over $1600 today and all I got was this lousy ice machine.

The old one bit the dust. Boy, did that hurt. Anyway, our friend Jim Emerson of Emerson's Heating and Cooling in Port St Joe, arranged for us to get this one at his wholesale price. What a good guy.

Dan picked it up in PC and Jim helped with the install. Now all I have to do is pay for it.

A Picture Is Worth You Know What...

After our "Dan's birthday" weekend at the pricey condo we had enjoyed for my birthday the previous month, I did contact the Director of Ops and expressed our disappointment with the unacceptable unit first assigned to us.

Let me remind readers that Dan got the front desk to move us. It took an hour, but we were ok with it.

Those of you who know me well, would be surprised that I pretty much kept my innate facetiousness in check and worded my constructive criticism kindly. (Well, just except for the remark about a tenement with a view.) Within the week I received a response from the director himself, and I quote: "Today I inspected the unit you requsted to move from.....this unit has new light fixtures, granite counter tops and many upgrades." Yesterday he requested detailed information and any photos I had taken.

Two of the eight photos are included here. He got back to me today, and I quote: "Thank you very much for the information and pictures. This will help Rental Services in urging the unit owner regarding upgrades and guests perception of their unit and the resort..........Please contact me directly for your next visit and I will ensure you get a nice unit and provide you with dinner for two at our ..... restaurant."

We really like this place and the amenities, and since he offered, I took him up on his offer. He will personally choose the 3 bedroom unit in which we'll spend 4 days over Christmas.

Dan's Birthday Weekend

Dan wanted a gourmand's delight for his birthday, so back we went to the condo complex we like in PCB. His birthday was everything he wanted and more, but it wasn't all pretty.

This is our second stay at this particular resort & on my birthday last month we were very impressed with our unit.

We would have requested the same one this time, but it was on the sixth floor & Dan wanted to be higher up. OK, we reserved last month before we left & were told we had a unit on the 11th floor. At check in, we find we are assigned to Tower 1, # 1004, so someone changed our unit from the original reservation. As we approached the doorway, we see a dirty crumpled up entry rug. Oh yeah. Downhill from there. This unit was a tenement with a view.

It was shockingly dirty with rusted out appliances, stained vertical blinds, ripped and torn master bedding, drawers which wouldn't close. My grandmother had a newer stove & she's been dead for 20 years. Dan got on the phone to let management know that this unit was not even rentable and after an hour we were reassigned to a unit in Tower #2 on the 11th floor. It was ok. Not nearly as nice as last month, but clean. Essential.

What I'm learning about condo rentals is that the individual owners are responsible for upkeep & maintenance. What I still don't understand is why management doesn't set minimal requirements for cleanliness and upkeep before they assign rental guests. Not to mention regular inspections of the units for compliance.

That issue aside, once we settled in, the sound of the surf & the incredible view lulled us into a state of relaxation. We had drinks at the on-site restaurant, which is actually quite good, but on this occasion, understaffed, so did take out from there to our rooms.

Birthday day!! Breakfast on site where they do a killer eggs benedict. Then for lunch, nachos at Jimmy Buffett's Margaritaville, (hence the above photo,) topped off by an awesome dinner at the Boar's Head Tavern. If great food while staring at stuffed feral pigs works for you, then you'd probably like it as much as we do. The porkers, (not to mention the occasional wolverine, tiger, fox & badger,) on the walls have a strange appeal.

The birthday boy was happy.

Off To a Good Start

This smile is totally fake because a frown makes me look older.
For the first time in several weeks, I have a full house tonight. Dan left, as usual at 4 PM for the V. The you know what hit the fan shortly afterwards.

# 5 called because her bathroom was flooded. When I called Dan, He told me to stick a towel under the leak. I did. # 1 called because their air conditioning isn't blowing cold enough. When I checked, I had to admit it could be cooler in there. While #1 was at the desk complaining and requesting one or more fans, my oldest friend from NJ called to tell me her mother passed away last night. I had to call her back so I could deal with #1. How rude am I to an old friend?

The kid from #6 just came in to ask me for a bobby pin for his mother's hair. A bobby pin??? Do they still make those things. I just may pull out my own hair before this night is over. It's only a litte after six. Plenty of time to lose my mind and my hair.

This is an addendum. It gets worse. Two women just checked in to my last room. Because it wasn't reserved, the air wasn't on. Not 5 minutes later they came for their money back because the ladies in #1 told them our air conditioning sucked and they didn't want to take a chance. Thanks girls. If they'd given it a chance they would have found that #3 has very strong air. I never argue or try to rationalize because a customer is going to perceive what they perceive. Nevertheless, I feel crappy about the whole night so far.

Sad Story

Very sad story.

For me that is. Isn't this a great picture of a boy & his big boy toy? Dan got a twofer by renting the front end loader over the weekend. My goal was a regraded driveway so we'd have better water run off after a downpour. Very willing to budget for it. Less mud means less work.

Dan always has a personal agenda & his was moving his sandpile, (don't ask, that's a whole other story,) and clearing underbrush for a spot to park his box trailer. He spent Saturday taking care of his priorities.

Well, he did move about 1/2 of the sand pile. A lot of it is outside my office window & the other 1/2 in another mountain out back.
Don't ask, I have no idea.

Sunday, the very next morning, out he goes to play some more & when I don't hear any noise, I already know disaster has struck. Sure enough. Flat tire. Could that have been from using a front end loader as a bulldozer?

The toy sat unused all of Sunday & was returned Monday morning. The exhorbitant bill was paid and the driveway is still full of ruts which will fill with rain, then mud, then mud in the rooms.

Do I sound a little ticked? Mmmmm, maybe.

The Hitchhiker

Some of you reading this are going to find it hard to believe, but The Ho & I swear it's true.

The Ho cultivates the bromiliads on her screened in porch & mine is one of her "pups." The hitchhiker used to live with her, then last winter took a trip to Key West in another plant given to girlfriend Carol. Carol is a snowbird & on her way back north she dropped off her plant to The Ho for winter safekeeping and guess who was still living in there? Shortly before she gave me my pup,The Ho sadly told me that the hitchhiker had disappeared. We knew we'd miss him, because he was such an intrepid adventurer.

When I went out to mist my plant today, I thought I saw a new leaf & stuck my finger in there. It moved! Then I looked closer and saw that cute little guy looking back at me. Could it be? I wondered.

When I emailed The Ho today to ask if she thought it was possible she emailed me the following response:

OMG I believe it is him! Can't remember exactly the last time I saw him but I think I brought the plant to you the last time we went to the Sunset which was Aug 12th. When the little tropical storm blew in on the 16th, I took all of the bromeliads out of the plant stands and put them on the floor of the screen porch to protect them from any wind and I hadn't seen him for a few days before that. The little fellow really does like to travel! Gene thinks it is him too, said that the little cracks on the porch are not big enough for him to get through and we didn't find him dead so he must have been in your plant, even though I thought I checked it good. Bet he thinks he is in heaven being outside with so many bugs to eat! How cool, he wintered in Key West last year, spent most of the summer here and now resides at the Dixie Belle Motel! A lot of mornings he would be in the center cup and loved it when I misted the plant, like he was getting a shower. LOL Thanks for the picture, you got a great shot! Now I have to e mail Carol, she will love it. Enjoy the little guy until he decides it is time to move on again! Love Ya,The Ho- Show quoted text ------ Original Message -----

From: Michele McDonough To: Ho Sent: Sunday, October 04, 2009 3:18 PMSubject: hitchhiker
Hey Ho, did your little froggie hitchhiker disappear before or after you gave me the bromeliad? I was checking the leaves this morning and guess what I found? Love, The QB

Cake Boy

Yesterday, I took a reservation from a guy in California who is apparently visiting friends in Port St Joe for Thanksgiving. He's only here for 3 days, but needs a full kitchen because he has to bake a cake. He tells me he is famous for his rum cake.

For 3 years in a row I had a guest I called "fruit & nut boy." He came from Vermont, all by himself & I always ran in to him in the pig buying fruit & nuts, so this new guy has now become "cake boy" in my mind.

When I sent his confirmation, I offered to supply him with a cake pan so he wouldn't have to bring one or, god forbid, try to find one in PSJ. He emailed back gratefully accepting the offer of a bundt pan & could I please include a mixing bowl. What he doesn't know is that the oven in unit #9 hasn't been checked for accuracy in years. I can't bear the thought that my oven could be the cause of cake disaster, so before he gets here I'll check it and let him know how accurate the temp is.

Baking is not like cooking. Baking is science & everything must be just right in order to get the desired results. Trust me, I know. I've had the undesired results way too often.

I know nothing about this guy, but I'm kind of liking him already. A man who bakes can't be all bad, right?

See All, Know Nothing

From my desk, I can see the entire front of the motel. The front window allows me to see who's approaching the office and of course my security camera in the lobby gives me a look at everyone before I walk to the front desk. This gives me the false impression that I know what's going on. Not.

Case in point. A young woman checked in this evening. When I asked how many people, she told me 2 adults and a 10 month old child. I don't charge for kids under 1 year. It wasn't long after when a pick up truck hauling a man and boy around 10-12 drive up to her room & settle in. At this point, I'm not sure how many people are in there. She paid cash, so I've been had. Not the first time.

A single woman with a reservation came to check in, walked up to the desk and said "what do I need to do." I said, "just pay me $108.58 & we'll be good." "Oh, she said, now? My money won't be available until tomorrow. Regardless of what I'm thinking, I keep my mouth shut & just look at her. " I'm going to have to go back out to my car, call my bank & move some funds around. I'll be right back, she says." We're talking about $108.78 here! Funds? When she returned, her debit card went through, so we're ok. Bizarre, but OK.

Apparently she has her mother with her & needs to take mom to Carrabelle which is about 50 miles to the east. When I told her it was a bit of a haul, she was surprised, because mom told her Carrabelle was just down the road. "I think I'll drop my stuff off & then make mom drive to Carrabelle, because I'm beat & she's driving me crazy."

After the car has been in front of the room for over an hour I look out & see the old lady standing outside the room taking a bunch of curlers out of her hair, arranging her do & checking her reflection in the window. Off they go.


Not even 20 minutes after that, the daughter returns without mom. Now I'm sitting here wondering if the old lady is at the bottom of the canal with a fluffy do and an anchor around her neck.

Dan's Other Woman

Do you see what's going on here? This female has taken complete possession of my husband's affections. She gets more pets and cuddling than I do. Look at that brazen hussy, all over him right in front of me. She doesn't have to say a word. Her eyes say it all. Meow..... "back off bitch."

I've Got Sirius, Seriously

Right now I'm listening to Jimmy Buffetts Margaritaville Radio, but at the push of a button I can have 40's swing, 50's rock & roll, 60's pop, bluegrass, show tunes, reggae or any one of more than 150 commercial-free radio stations.

Dan gave me the Stratus 5 with docking station for my car, but later I talked him into a docking boom box for the house. Now I can have my Sirius in the house or on the go. The audio on the boom box is awesome.

Installation didn't come without it's frustrations however. The antenna has to be mounted outside, so we tried threading the wire through a gap around the air conditioner in the office. Before we were done, we damn near tore down the entire wall. This office is nothing more than rotting wood siding, an inch of insulation, and warped fiberboard interior walls. Now I'm more than a little worried about how long this structure will last. Seriously.

What's A Dulfink?

Yesterday, a couple from Salzburg, Austria checked in and even though they spoke english pretty well, it took a while for us to understand each other. This morning they came in to tell me they liked the room and the area, but wanted to see dulfinks. I'm a little slow on the uptake before my second cup of coffee, but eventually I got it. I sent them to the marina office where I hoped they could hook up with some kind of dolphin cruise.

Funny though, The Ho and I had a dulfink sighting during lunch a couple of weeks ago. I hope my guests were as lucky as we were.

"Dancing" Bye Bye

Was I right or was I right??? Pathetic. They had to go.

Still Look Great In a Bikini

Today we Red Hats picnicked at the city pavilion in Mexico Beach. Since it was my birthday month I got to wear pink. The Gulf was calm and the September breeze perfect. We all brought dishes to share, but in all modesty, mine was best. Yesterday, I prepared a Mediterranean Picnic Loaf. It's a wonderful combination of elements stuffed into a hollowed out french bread, spread with pesto & drizzled with olive oil. It then gets wrapped tightly in plastic wrap & refrigerated for a day while the flavors get happy and soak into the bread. Yum

Moving on the girls night on Dancing With The Stars. I had more trouble determining who was who than with the men. There was an exquisite swim suit model who did very well as did a singer named Mya. Singer Macy Gray danced with all the grace of a stalled eighteen wheeler. When she finished, I was waiting for the Zamboni to come & smooth out the floor. Kathy Ireland wasn't too far behind. The surprise of the evening was Kelly Osbourne, the daughter of Ozzie. Last I saw her, she was a chubby teenage punker with a lot of metal hanging off her face. Last night she was a delightful, charming and graceful young lady who made her mother so proud that mom bawled like a baby after the performance. I can't wait to see how she develops as a dancer.

Sent to me by girlfriend Joyce Cowan & anyone who grew up in Atlantic City will love this!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LG6R2V9X3ks

"Dancin" is Back!

I'm happy.

The new season of "Dancing With The Stars" premiered last night. One of my absolutely favorite TV shows even though one TV pundit referred to it as "Dancing With The Barely Recognizable." He had a point, but even if the faces and names of the contestants are barely "C" list, I get involved and have favs already.

Last night was men's night and the 8 male contestants danced one ballroom and one latin. It's immediately obvious that Donny Osmond and Aaron Carter (a pop singer?) are going to be the front runners. Both have dance experience and Carter is quite the showman.

There are 2 guys I really liked and each has some potential to stay in the game for awhile. Chuck Liddell, a tattooed, shaved headed, professional brawler, but so cute and Michael Irvin a former Dallas Cowboy and sports announcer. Irvin has a handicap. His professional partner is new to "Dancing" and she isn't comfortable with her teaching and choreography yet. But she's tall & so a good physical fit with her partner. These two macho men have lots of personality and seem to be putting major effort into actually doing well. Just think what they put on the line when they agreed to do this show.

The one who needs to go at elimination on Wed is Ashley Hamilton, George Hamilton's son. He has none of his father's charm, he has three left feet with no potential for improvement. His smile twinkles, but not his toes.

Tonight is ladies night. Let's see how they do. I'm no Carrie Ann Inaba, but I'm very opioninated and I love dance. Last night, I was wishing my mother was watching the show with me. She was a good dancer & I'd have loved to hear what she had to say.

Ed & Bill's Excellent Adventure

Damn, I was having so much fun, I forgot to take pictures. On Wednesday, Eddie & Billy flew in from Hammonton, NJ and I met them at the PC airport. We stopped for dinner in Mexico Beach, a quirky little beach town about 10 miles from the motel. Toucan's tacky, touristy, tiki bar is right on the Gulf of Mexico & even though it was raining for the umteenth day in this part of the panhandle we enjoyed the beachy atmosphere & the ribs were awesome.

When the rain cleared late Thursday we did the 1/2 hour drive to Apalachicola, a shrimping and oystering village with a funky New Hope kind of vibe. Stopped at the estuarine museum to check out the indiginous fish up close & personal, had drinks at the historic Gibson Inn and dinner at one of our favs, Carolines on the river.

We stayed up way too late, drank way too much & "some" of us took our card game of kreights way too seriously. Next day, I was beat. I just can't hang any more. We rallied enough for a ride out Cape San Blas where we could see the mainland across the bay & then climbed over the dunes to the beach on the Gulf. The sand is like sugar & we enjoyed a frolic in the surf. Yes, a frolic. If you haven't frolicked lately, you don't know what you're missing.

When I dropped my dear friends off at the airport on Sat morning I was feeling as if they had just arrived. Our visit went by so fast. I'm just grateful they made the trip down here to LA (Lower Alabama.) to visit. It meant a lot to me.

Birthday Indulgence

All I wanted for my birthday was to have a couple of days to chill in luxury. I got that and more. The condo we booked in PCB exceeded my expectations big time. For a girl who spends most of her life in a 30 something year old single wide trailer the gourmet kitchen with granite & stainless, the beautifully dressed king bed with a view wall plus sliders to the balcony, the two full baths (what fun deciding which pot to piss in), the 2 54" plasmas, the tiled, mirrored sitting area with sliding window wall overlooking the polynesian pool with beach beyond, the bars, restaurants, spa, golf course and personal service just made me sit back & say "Ah."

I brought some wine, brie, crackers & homemade chicken salad for our check-in night, but we did walk around the property and stop in the main bar for a few. That night was the only one without rain, but I'm a rain lover & having a front row seat for the storms coming through was fun. I had my covered balcony and a panoramic view. It was great.

On arrival, we parked at the entrance to our "tower" , I love that, "our tower." We never had to move the car. Everything we wanted was there or within walking. And we did take a walk across the street after our completely decadent breakfast on Mon morn. The on-site restaurant is typical upscale beach decor with a rather limited menu, but very pleasant. We just didn't know what to expect from the kitchen. Dan, being an eggs benedict addict glommed right on to that, but he's very particular about his eggs being pleasantly runny. I, on the other hand, had to go for the crab cakes benedict, but I like my eggs firmer. Both dishes came out perfect and absolutely delectible. The english muffins were swimming in butter & toasted to perfection. I know, I know, I was in heaven, even as my arteries were hardening.

I was so entirely satiated that I had to forgo my planned ice cream cone lunch. After spending the day lounging & and enjoying the foul weather we rallied for a casual dinner.

One of my favorite things and something I could enjoy over & over again was lying in bed in the AM watching the beach and Gulf of Mexico without even having to take my head off the pillow.

Before we left this morning, we booked a similar unit for Dan's birthday next month. His special request was to be on the top floor. They were able to give us the 11th. Close enough.

Birthday Getaway

Tomorrow I'm heading over to PCB to the Edgewater Beach Resort. I will be taking Dan even though he has not been a good boy. Last night the VFW was serving grilled rib eye dinners for $10, so Dan asked me if I wanted one & I said, at that price, sure. He didn't show with dinner until almost 9PM & so I had already eaten by that time. What a waste.

My birthday is Monday and over the years, I have learned that if I want a special day, I'm going to have to plan it myself. I'm taking wine, brie and I made myself a curried chicken salad. There's a Pizza Hut on site, so Dan won't starve. This is all for Sunday. For the actual birthday day, I haven't decided yet, so will play it by ear. There's a restaurant at the resort, lots of pools and a spa. In addition there's a few restaurants in PCB that I like.

We'll be back around noon on Tues & I'll post some pics.

Or Is It?

Well...the long hot weekend and the long hot summer is over. Or is it?? I had three one night reservations for tonight & they checked in early so I figured I could put my feet up and relax. The week after Labor Day is traditionally one of the slowest.

So here I am enjoying a glass of wine when in comes a couple looking for a non-smoking room. Mine were all full & all I had left were smoking, so I sent them down the road to the Mainstay. Next I get 4 guys from Panama city wanting 2 rooms because they were tired after a full day of scalloping. During conversation I find out they own the parasailing concession right next to the condo where Dan & I will be spending my birthday this weekend. They offered to teach me & I think I'd love it, but wondering if someone with osteoporosis should take the chance. I think the up in the air part would be great, but the landing part could be problematic. Maybe I'll send Dan. He used to jump out of perfectly good airplanes, so I don't see why he wouldn't love parasailing.

But, I digress. I'm back to my wine when a threesome from the Czech Republic wanders in off the road and takes another room.

I'm not all that thrilled with this, because tomorrow is my once a month lunch with my BFF The Ho and I like to finish work early so I can clean up a little first. Sometimes the income has to take a backseat to the personal life, but I'm not going to turn anyone away when I have an available room, it just doesn't make business sense. Not to mention that slower times are coming.

I put out the "NO VACANCY" and still they come. This is so bizarre. I just sent another group down to Mexico Beach and it's only 8:50 PM.

In the meantime, I've done a sloppy pedicure & manicure so I'll be semi ready for lunch out tomorrow.

Simple Pleasures

When we moved into the trailer again, in lieu of a real closet, we put in a rack on wheels & I ordered 30 of those Joy Mangano huggable hangers. They're terrific for saving space and quite attractive.

Over the months, nasty, ugly, viral plastic hangers of various colors moved in. Once they had a foothold, they grew. It was a minor irritant in my day, but one that made me unhappy every time I looked at it. Each day I vowed to order more of Joy's huggables, but, hey, they're not cheap.

I finally caved & ordered a pricey new batch of hangers. It surprised me that I was waiting for them with such anticipation. I was really excited. They arrived yesterday & I immediately tossed the bad guys & rehung (is that a word?) everything on my new pretty camel & brass huggables.

Now our "closet" makes me smile & that was worth every penny spent. I do need to go on record saying that Dan has 33 shirts on his side & I have 15.

Double rainbow

Wow, walked out my front door this evening and there was this beautiful gift. The double was faint & it's even harder to see in the photos, but it was very evident. The sun was setting and the rainbow lasted for less than 10 minutes, but what a show! Thank you Mother Nature, you made my day.

August Red Hat Get Together

Today, we Red Hat "girls" had a fun lunch at the Fish House in Mexico Beach. We're a small group in summer, since a lot of members are snowbirds & will show up come winter. In the photo on the left closest to the camera is my BFF, Joyce, alias "The Ho," right behind her is Shirley, our Queen Mum and in the back, the lady in pink is Francis, our August birthday girl. In your birthday month you get to wear pink. Mine is next month, and since it's going to be a beach picnic, I have a surprise in store.

We all hate the long banquet style tables for group gatherings. It's impossible to interact with everyone. If I had a restaurant, I would put in those nice big round tables one finds at weddings. This is a wonderfully diverse group of women & I so enjoy hearing what they have to say. Each month I learn more about each one.