Wishful Thinking

In the last 45 minutes, I've had 6 mothers calling to try and reserve rooms for their deadbeat sons who got temp jobs training for oil spill clean up. This being July 4th weekend, I can only accommodate a few of them for a night or two.   I feel for these parents and can picture them while talking with me, down on their knees praying.  "Please let this job work out for this kid and let me get my life back.,"  I already have 2 men in their 30's in rooms which I had to charge to their parent's credit card.  Is that pathetic?  Only one of the mothers told me her son was under 21.  The rest were men???

On that same note, one of our Red Hat ladies, 72 years old, trained for beach oil clean up.  "Hey", she said, "the pay is $18 per hour and I work 1/2 hour on and 15 minutes off.  I can do that!"

Looking A Gift Horse In The Mouth

Some lovely guests checking in tonight brought me a whole bag of corn on the cob from Georgia.
That was such a nice thing for them to do.  There's only one problem, it was frozen solid.  Mortal sin!!!!!  Sacrilege!!!!!!!  Those of us from New Jersey know that corn must be eaten the same day as picked.  I remember my uncle, Big Dan, driving all the way from Ventnor to Somers Point to get his farm fresh corn.  We Garden Staters have been so spoiled and we won't settle for second best.

There's another guest who brings us steaks and ground beef from his own steers.  He has a cattle ranch and butchers one steer a year for personal use.  A lot of folks don't know that Florida is cattle country.  A lot of prime beef is raised here and I'm grateful to Keith and Betty for being so generous to us.  We had the T bones a few nights ago & they were awesome.

What Eats Rid X???

There's a Rid X eating critter living in my laundry room.  It actually cleaned out the area under the floor where the ramp connects the two sections of the laundry.  Every morning there would be another pile of detritus next to the opening.  Today it was a pretty small pile, so I guess nest cleaning is about done.  This thing also drags a pretty good sized box of roach traps from the back of the laundry up toward the front.  The box is riddled with bite marks. So  whatever eats Rid X and is going after roach bait has some decent size sharp teeth. 

But Who's Counting?

It was 85 degrees at 8 AM when I started work outside this morning.  It's almost 100 in the shade now.  Shegundala had a prior commitment, so  I had to fly solo today turning over 7 rooms and making up 2 stays.  That tallied out to making 17 beds, schlepping dirty towels and linens to the laundry and schlepping the clean ones back to 9 rooms, loading, unloading and folding 8 loads of sheets and towels, sanitizing  bathrooms, emptying trash, replacing amenities, mopping, vacuuming and surface cleaning 9 rooms.  This old broad is hurtin'. 

Copy Of Letter Sent Today

On Dixie Belle letterhead, this letter was mailed out today.

Mr.  (Ignorant Frickin' Jackass),

In reference to your stay here at the Dixie Belle Motel with your lady friend on Wednesday, June 9, consider this a bill for damages incurred.

You and your lady friend smoked in a non smoking room.  The fee for violation of the smoking policy is clearly stated on a notice posted in the room.

We will overlook the fact that you disconnected the smoke alarm, putting the entire building and every guest in danger, and that you urinated in the bedding.

We will however, expect your payment of the stated fee of $250.00 for violation of the non smoking policy.

Sincerely,


Blah, Blah, Blah
Owner

We know we'll never see a dime.  We just hope his wife opens the letter.

At Least I Got To Meet Marvin

Had an early Dr. appt in Panama City, then did a litle shopping.  At my Winn Dixie stop, I picked up a sandwich at the deli & was sitting in my car in the parking lot, reading a magazine when 2 little girls knocked on the passenger side window.  I thought they might be selling girl scout cookies, so I lowered the window.  " Your car is leaking gas," one said.  "Yeah, said the other, a lot of gas."  I semi-panicked since I was 30 miles from home.  I threw my sandwich in the trash & floored it to the nearest gas station/convenience store.  The 3 mile trip used up 1/8 tank of gas, so I knew I was in trouble.

As I pulled up to the gas pump, whoooosh....the remaining gas just poured out onto the ground.  In ten seconds the tank was too dry to even turn the engine over.  Since Verizon service is so bad, I've stopped carrying my cell phone and had to borrow one from a clerk at the convenience store.  I called my AARP Motoring Plan.  First they tried to get me to agree to a tow to a Pep Boys 9 miles west.  I live 26 miles east.  Apparently the Pep Boys would give me a 10 % discount as well as kick back to the Motor Club. 

"Sorry kid, nice try, but you're going to have to find someone more gullible.  I want to be towed to Lee's in Port St Joe, where I happen to live."  Over an hour later Marvin from Spud Bubba Wrecking Service shows up.  Marvin was a sweet guy.  He talked the entire 26 mile trip to PSJ.  I know what his last 2 electric bills were, where he likes to take a shower and that one of his 6 cats got sick with a stomach full of pus.  Green pus. 

Not As Dumb As They Look

I have been outsmarted by a couple of oversized, overalled yahoos from the hills of Tennessee.  Even though I'm certainly not a good loser, I have to give credit where credit is due.

Actually, there are four huge men, sharing a small room with 2 beds.  Their luggage (a huge Rubbermaid tub for each man) is piled high.  The first night of their stay they pulled the curtains off the windows, and messed up the bath towels.  When they came to us asking to extend their stay by one night, we told them there was nothing available.  Yep, liar, liar, pants on fire.  I didn't feel one bit guilty though and the next day when they asked again, I looked the guy right in the eye & still denied having a vacancy available for them.

I've always thought my bullshitting skills were better than average, but he must have seen through me because....he had his wife call the office pretending to be a new customer, and booked a room for the extra night.  He caught me in the laundry room early this morning & asked when they could move into their new room.  I'f my teeth weren't all mine, I would have dropped them when he told me what they did.  Checkmate!

One Girl Too Many

It looks like this sonofabitch is finally going to get his comeuppance. So tragic that another young woman had to die first.

Natalee Holloway's mother is staying quiet for the moment.  She's afraid to jinx the investigation and she's afraid to get her hopes up after spending years living with the knowledge that this lowlife was responsible for her daughter's disappearance. 

My Domestic Side

I know, I know.  But, yes folks, I do have a domestic side and in my dotage have actually become a rather accomplished cook.  I just watched an episode of Paula Deen, the queen of cream.  She outdid herself with these two dishes. 

She actually made a bread pudding with Krispy Kreme donuts as the base then had the temerity to top it off with a glaze made with a stick of butter, a pound of confectioners sugar and a generous helping of rum.  I'm going to skip this one.  The recipe that grabbed me was her fried biscuits.  That's right, fried biscuits stuffed with honey butter.  This I have to try.

You buy supermarket biscuit dough in a tube ala Pillsbury.  Heat oil in a fry pan about an inch deep & fry those puppies up for a couple of minutes on each side.  Now here's the kicker, as if frying biscuits isn't enough.  Take one of those plastic ketchup dispensers with the cone top and fill it with soft honey butter.  While still warm & crispy, jam that cone into the biscuit and fill the inside with honey butter.  OMG  I'm having palpitations just thinking about them.  I'll follow up after I actually do this and taste them for myself.  Just one, of course.

Now I have a laundry tip I'd like to pass on.  The Dixie Belle prides itself on providing fluffy, soft, scented bath towels.  I use Gain liquid fabric softener, but here's the secret.  From a gallon container, pour off 8 to 10 ounces and save for later.  Replace with the same amount of white vinegar.  Shake it up to combine and use as normal.  The white vinegar removes all traces of not so good odors and softens beautifully.  The bonus is that you're stretching a rather expensive product, so you'll be saving money.  Try it. 

My eldest child DD Denise had her birthday on Memorial Day.  I sure wish I had a photo to post (hint, hint)  and I want to go on record as saying that giving birth to one of your best friends is a real gift.  I love that beautiful woman.