Good Thing They Weren't Elephants

No photos for this post.  It wasn't a pretty sight. Today I checked on some of the rooms which had not been occupied recently.  One never knows.  Unit #3 looked ok on cursory inspection, but when I checked the bathroom, in the shower corner I found a bunch of black dots & smudges.  I also found them on the clean bath mat, and later on the carpet by the door. 

It didn't look like insects or rodent poop, so I had the DH check it out.  He was convinced that it was indeed an invasion by a herd of mice.  There was a hole in the floor of the shower where I saw the biggest concentration.

On reinspection, I found the nasty evidence in other places.  The foil stove top liners were chewed, there was poop behind the toaster and around the sink.  I spent an hour in there, cleaning and recaulking the shower to at least plug up the obvious entrance.  Then I set 3 strategic traps.  This is war!

Thank god they weren't elephants or the poop would have been over my head.

Proud Mama

Here's my DD Danielle receiving her Bachelor of Science degree with top honors from Flagler College.  I was privileged to be there as she was honored with the award for being valedictorian of her graduating class.

Kudos to a woman with such determination that she held down two jobs, raised a family and still managed to earn her degree with excellence.   She is an example and an inspiration to women of any age that if one desires something with passion then one should go for it.

My Winter Escape

I've escaped!!  Well, not completely.  These photos are of a vacation rental I took for the month of December.  I was there the first 4 days of December then had to come back to the DB to take care of some business.  Going back in a couple of days & the DH will join me for the weekend.

The deck is very private and the stairs at the back lead to a rooftop deck with an ocean view.  From the sliding glass doors I can see my own private jungle & I think I'll stick a Christmas tree out there.  I'm not really into Christmas these days, but a tree will look festive.  The place is a little spotlessly clean doll house.  A tad dated, but it has everything I need and is close to the DD and family.

Oh!  Let me bitch for a moment.  I'm paying big bucks for this little get away & when I went to the office to ask about inviting my family to  come into the park and have dinner with me, I was told I'd have to pay $5 a head.  I'm outraged.  I understand the need to monitor the comings and goings, and I would agree if they were overnight guests, but I'm going to have to pay everytime I have someone stop by That's just wrong.  I paid the $20 to have my children to dinner, but that's the last time.

Because I feel it's wrong, I refuse to cooperate.  The DD lives in the subdivision across the street, so I will run a shuttle service in my own vehicle.  I'm reminded of the old drive-in movie days when we used to hide extra people in the trunk.  I won't violate the park policy of no more than 6 people visiting a site, but I'll be damned if I'm going to pay $5 every time my grandkids want to stop by after school.  I want to have my family over to decorate the tree and have dinner and no way am I paying $30 for 6 guests to visit me for a couple of hours.  Arrest me, throw me out.  Fat chance.

On a positive note, my first few days of relative aloneness were worth the price of admission.  I slept late, shopped, walked, read, cooked and reveled in the pure pleasure of a solitary existance.  I did what I wanted, when I wanted and answered to no one.  I had nothing to do but please myself.  The escape was so worth it and I can't wait to go back.

Hotel Nazis

We get visited by the Florida hotel nazis twice a year and my most recent visit was in July. Two very officious people showed up flashing badges and frowns.  I had to open up three rooms and my laundry/ storage area for inspection.  I've been doing this for 9 years now & usually I get written up for not having my cleaning products properly labeled.

The Florida regs are pretty basic.  Label your chemicals, don't keep chemicals where they can contaminate linens and towels, have working outside fire extinguishers and smoke alarms in each room.These folks wrote me up for stuff I didn't even know were violations.

A cigarette burn in a chair (I have since sewed it together,) a missing ceramic tile in a bathroom (I smacked some joint compound in the hole,) a bit of mold in a refrigerator gasket (I cloroxed it and now do that on a regular basis,) and missing ceiling tiles in my laundry room.  I agree, the tiles needed to be replaced.  They've been like that for 9 years.  After getting the write up, I asked the DH to please, please make that job a priority, because at reinspection, if the violation hasn't been addressed you will be fined.

I've been begging & pleading since July.  I wrote notes and pasted them on his computer.  No luck.  So what I did was go out & buy myself an electric staple gun & hid it.  Can't let the DH touch my tools.  They disappear into his black hole.  Tonight I snuck out to the laundry and tackled the project myself.  Not a piece of cake!  In fact it was a bitch.  The staple gun didn't do the job, so I nailed the damn things up there.  By the time I had 3 tiles done,  I was done.  I'll go out each evening a do a couple more until I fill in all the missing squares. 

If you look close, you can see my handiwork.

I know, it's terrible, but once I fill in all the squares I won't have to worry about a fine.  I'll do a few each day.  PS  I did rotate the photo, but it didn't come out right either.

Fall Anywhere

It's my absolute favorite time of year wherever I am.  These photos are my backyard tonight, just before sunset.  Today was a rare day in northwest Florida.  Low humidity, cool enough to need sleeves and colors so sharp they inspired a double take.

My recent trip to NJ took me through the still colorful leafiness of North and South Carolina and I was appropriately awed. But when I arrived at my DD's home, stepped out of my car into her knee deep drifts of leaves piled at the curb and smelled the earthy perfume of a south Jersey fall, I felt so home.  Not "at home" but home.  The entire time I spent in NJ, I breathed deeply and saved the memory of the scent to bring back to Florida with me.

Ely Rodriguez

I've been in New Jersey for the last week to be with my daughter Denise and her children.  Here is her husband Ely's obituary as written by her.

Ely Rodriguez
42, of Mays Landing, passed away unexpectedly on November 2, 2010

Ely is survived by the light of his life, his son Logan, by his wife Denise, and his three stepchildren:  Zachary, Cody, and Chelsea.  He also leaves behind his stepfather Jose Carmona, his father Gabriel Rodriguez, 16 brothers and sisters, and his beloved nieces and nephews.  He is predeceased by his mother, Nicasia.

Ely was honorably discharged from the United States Army in 1988 and worked as a waiter, photographer, and salesman before settling into his job as a repair clerk at Verizon 11 years ago.  Ely will be remembered for his huge personality, for being the life of every party, for being the Pittsburgh Steelers' #1 fan, and for his ability to make friends wherever he went.  But mostly he will be remembered for his unwavering devotion and loyalty to his family and friends, and for being the best husband and daddy anyone could ask for. 

It goes on to give details of the  celebration of his life which was attended by an overwhelming number of relatives and friends, many who spoke with eloquence and sincerity about this man who loved life, his son and family and the people who will never forget him.

I'm Doing This

　

Saturday, Nov. 6, 2010 Quite Possibly the Biggest Beach Walk in the World Through a one-day beach walk that covers 825 miles of Florida beaches, organizations and individual volunteers around the state will celebrate our sandy shores and show the world – with photos from each mile - Florida’s beaches are as wonderful as ever. Florida Organizations Partnering for Florida This event is being supported and promoted by a number of great Florida organizations. VISIT FLORIDA, the state’s official tourism marketing organization, is hosting the overall effort, including the website to enlist volunteers and promotion beyond state boundaries to potential visitors. Volunteer Florida is organizing the official volunteer efforts across the state. The Florida Restaurant and Lodging Association is reaching out through its extensive network of partners to let Floridians know about the event and support participants. The Florida Lottery is providing promotional support, and organizations such as the Florida State Parks and the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission are contributing expertise and volunteers. Sunshine State Momentum Within the first few days of official registration, all 34 Florida beach counties had their volunteer hosts on the case. Local service organizations, Scout troops, Big Brothers/Big Sisters, Keep Florida Beautiful, Stetson, and tourism organizations are just a few of the folks stepping up to organize and serve as volunteer walkers and photo-takers in their counties. Event Day Registered volunteers (individuals and groups) will head out to walk their official mile sometime after sunrise and take a photograph along the way to upload to the internet. By 11 am EST, each official County Host will know how many of its county’s miles have been walked and photographed, and will report in to the Operations Centers. All photos will be displayed on
www.visitflorida.com/beachwalk
There will be two hub locations for media - one in Miami and one in Northwest Florida – where Operations Centers will be set up to receive updates throughout the event from County Hosts. Update information will include the number of volunteers participating, the number of miles walked and the photos uploaded to the VISIT FLORIDA website. In both hub locations, there will be:
• a sunrise kick-off address
• groups of walkers heading out at set intervals throughout the morning
• an 11:30 EST closing ceremony to recognize the achievement of the volunteers . Local Volunteers, Local Events, Local Media Opportunities Each county will have its own agenda, but all will follow the overall timing of the event. In some counties, there are
additional special events in conjunction with the Beach Walk. As their schedules evolve, information is being posted to
www.visitflorida.com/beachwalk. We are encouraging media to participate as well as report on the event. Post Event: All photos can be seen on www.visitflorida.com/beachwalk. Visitors to the site will be able to vote on their favorite beach mile and be entered in a sweepstakes to win a Mazda Miata and $5,000 to take their own tour of Florida beaches. Important Connections: www.VISITFLORIDA.com/beachwalk www.VolunteerFlorida.org
GET INVOLVED! REGISTER. Find your county host.Media contact: kathyt@visitflorida.org and (850) 345-6494

See special events in your area. Help spread the word. Thank you!

Interesting Cast of Characters

Last week, here at the Dixie Belle, we were treated to an interesting cast of characters.  First there were a couple of our regulars.  Dr. Domestic Dispute, who wouldn't let me put any calls through to his room from his wife.  "We're fighting," he told me, "and I don't want to talk to her."  Which put me squarely in the middle since the wife called several times.

In a separate room was his assistant, Nurse Snatchit.  Every time she stays here, she takes pretty much everything that's not nailed down.  She doesn't drink our in-room coffee, but takes all packs as well as the cups.  She brings her own soap, but takes our wrapped soap.   We've stopped putting extra rolls of toilet paper in her room because out the door they go.

Mr. & Mrs. Stinky Feet were here for an entire fetid week.  Neither me nor Shegundela wanted to be the first one to open their door for housekeeping.  The shoes left in the room reeked so badly we couldn't inhale.  Shegundela sprayed the insides of all the shoes with OdoBan which is very effective usually but didn't make a dent in those stinky shoes.

The newlyweds were delightful.  Both well into their 70's, they spent an active week fishing and sightseeing.  She gave me 2 jars of her homemade fig preserves and they were absolutely the best preserves I ever tasted.

Then there was Mercedes Guy. Actually a friendly charming guy.  He introduced himself to me, shook my hand, told me he see me again in a couple of weeks and drove out of the parking lot in his black incredibly shiny ride.  I found out how he polished that baby when I discovered my formerly fluffy white bath towels a nasty shade of grey-black.

The pies de resistance was Drunk Harley Guy.  We live in the trailer attached to our office.  When we rehabbed the tin can, we turned the former living room into our master bedroom, so there's an exterior door not far from the foot of the bed.  We do have a gate, albeit unlocked, with a sign saying no entry, private area.  Anyhoo...I was awakened at 11:40 PM by pounding on my bedroom door. 

Rather confused, my first thought was that it might be the DH who could have misplaced his keys, so in my underwear, I thread my way through the maze of rooms to the front office window to check if there's a vehicle outside.  Seeing no vehicle, I go back to the bedroom which is pitch black because I don't want to turn on any interior lights. Someone is still pounding on my bedroom door.   In order to gather my thoughts, I thought I sat on the foot of the bed, but only one cheek made contact and I fell hitting my head, right ear and shoulder on the corner of the opening to the next room while my hip bone made contact with the floor.

Now I'm hurting, I'm bleeding and I'm really mad.  I throw on a robe and go back to my office to get my weapon out of the drawer.  By this time, the knocker has come to the front office door and started pounding again.  From the front desk, I can see a guy with straggly blond hair, a blue cut away T shirt and a lot of tats.  I rested my elbows on the front desk and aimed the gun directly at his head, absolutely ready to pull the trigger. 

The excitement pretty much ends here because he gave up after several minutes.  I had mixed emotions.  I was mad enough to blow his head off so it took another hour before I cooled off enough to go back to bed. 

Next morning  I found a very nice Harley parked out by the front fence.  When Shegundela came to work at 10 AM, she told the rest of the story.  Harley guy went through the fence to the house next door where she lives & pounded on her door.  She had her husband there, so they actually opened their door. Harley guy told her he was too drunk to drive his bike home, so she got dressed and drove him to a motel in town while telling him that he was very lucky that the Dixie Belle lady did not indeed blow his brains out.

This Hotel Manager Speaks For Me

In response to a recent article on the travel site Gadling.com the following comment was posted.  I agree completely with this woman's point of view.  I'm passing this along even though some comments don't apply to the Dixie Belle,but  everyone who ever stays in a hotel/motel can benefit by knowing some of these things before your next stay.

Kristina Oct 5th 2010 10:07PM


I am the General Manager of a hotel in NY. The fastest way to get what you want is ABSOLUTELY to be nice. If you are nasty when you arrive, you can bet on the fact that we will put a note on your reservation, on the housekeeping notes and in what we call the "log book". If you start out your stay nasty, we absolutely will do anything possible to NOT help you. A few important papers, should be locked away at the desk. I know my front desk staff better than I know my housekeepers, and to be quite honest, we are not responsible for the things left if your room. It says it right on the back of your door. Along with the innkeepers laws, the fire escape route, the maximum rate allowed to be charged for the room etc, it tells you right there. The past court cases have sent precedents that a rented hotel room is much like an apartment. I can go in whenever I please, but you cannot hold me responsible for anything that happens to your belongings. Unfortunately, there is no renters insurance for hotel rooms.

1. NEVER book using an internet site. Always call the hotel directly. Sites purchase rooms from us at a discounted rate, which yes, helps us fill rooms. What they don't tell you is that your room is guaranteed for only two people (unless specified otherwise), that your smoking preference is not necessarily guaranteed and that you will be the FIRST person to be moved out of your chosen room type if we are overbooked. We also will move people who pay the most to the suites if we are overbooked on standard room types. You should first and foremost look on the internet for pricing, using sites such as Kayak.com. Then you need to go to our website, THEN you need to call the hotel. If you are staying more than one night, my staff are instructed to automatically offer you a lower rate, or a free suite upgrade at the price of a standard to ensure that you will walk in the door happy and stay with us again.



2. Always research the area you are travelling to. If you do not like noise, DO NOT book an airport hotel. If you start complaining about the noise from the airport, we are going to assume you are a moron. YOU booked this hotel, we did not force you. If you want a lower rate, do not book in the middle of the city. Yes it is convenient. But you will have to pay a hefty parking fee, if you can even get a space. You will also have to deal with more noise. All hotels have their information on the internet, on a printable page that outlines the features of the hotel.



3. Do not complain about the quality of the towels, bedding, soap, shampoo, FREE breakfast, etc. We do not have a choice as to which of these things we purchase and use. Our brands have standards that we have to follow, or we pay fines. You will most likely not get a discount. We will simply come out and tell you that we are forced to purchase these things through our brand supplier.



4. If your room is not cleaned to your standards, please for the love of god, simply ask the front desk to have a housekeeper come by again. I am usually the one who will come and clean your room because I want to see for myself where my staff is lacking. The management really does care what the rest of the staff does during their workday. Mistakes are made. You are not perfect in your job either.



5. If, during your stay, the housekeepers did not clean your room, or did not make your bed, its almost half of the time, the guests fault. If you leave your Do Not Disturb tag on the door, the only person who can go in your room is a manager. And yes, we will check the room to make sure no one is lying in there dead. We are required to enter each room every 24 hours to make sure there is nothing wrong. If your bed is not made, please look to see if you left personal items on the bed. My staff are not allowed to touch your belongings.



6. If you have children, ask to be placed on a lower floor. Or in the rooms directly over the front desk, or other non-room space. Then the kids can run around all they want and you wont get a phone call from my staff asking you to knock it off. We really do want you to enjoy your vacation.

7. Do not EVER yell at my staff. Or get violent. I will have you not only thrown out of the hotel, but I can have you arrested.

8. Do not leave valuables in the room. EVER. There is a safe deposit box at the front desk. All medication, jewelery, money, electronics, passports,

9. When I tell you that there is nothing I can do, there is either A. Really nothing we can do because we are full etc, or B. you have been a complete jerk and I am not going to help you.



10. Do not take things from the rooms. Not the towels, blankets, pillows, ashtrays, NOTHING. My housekeepers do pay attention and I will charge your credit card. On the registration paper that you signed, it clearly states that any damages to the room or theft of items will result in charges to your card. Yes I will charge you twice what it costs for the item.



11. I will post an extra cleaning fee to your room if you leave the hotel and it takes my housekeepers forever to clean up your disaster. They have me come upstairs and take pictures, and no fighting with your credit card company will help you. My account with the card company is bigger than yours as a corporate business.



12. If you want a quiet floor, ask for the floor where the corporate travellers are kept. I put them on the highest floor of the hotel so that they won't be bothered. They spend 50 times what you spend in my hotel and are treated the best. I know all of their names, wives names, have pictures of their kids, and will honest to god bring them breakfast in bed free of charge if they are sick. I will also pick up their drycleaning, have flowers sent to their wife for them or anything else. Corporate travellers are our favorite guests because they usually only have housekeeping come in every few days, dont make any noise, are out early and back late and they dont complain.



13. If you are not travelling on government business, do not try to book the federal rate. I will catch you and most likely charge you more that you should have been charged if you had been honest.



14. Don't try to cram 15 people in one room. You are breaking the fire code and you can absolutely be fined for this. We charge an extra person fee in the room because if costs us more in wear and tear, linen usage, breakfast costs etc. Sometimes, we will waive the extra person fee if you are nice.



15. Dont call the 800 number for the brand. They are in a foreign country and have NO IDEA whether they are booking you in the right neighborhood, much less the right country. We cannot cancel your reservation outside of our cancellation guidelines because the owners of the hotel would fire us. Your $100 is not worth my salary, I'm sorry.



16. Do not let elderly people book rooms for themselves if they are not seasoned travellers. It sounds horrible, but they honestly end up really frustrated because they don't really understand a lot of the policies we have in place and they drive the front desk staff crazy when they say "WHAAAT??" every three seconds.



17. You have to give a credit card to book a room. Period. I will sometimes hold a reservation until 6pm for you. If you are late, I will sell your room.



18. If you do not know the difference between a debit and a credit card, do not use your debit card. Our credit card system cannot tell the difference and will deduct the money from your bank account electronically until well after you have checked out. We release the money back to you the day you check out. It can take your bank up to 10 days to get it back in your account. If you cannot afford to have that money held up, hit the ATM and just pay in cash. You will usually have to put down a fifty dollar deposit, but you get it back. It saves a lot of grief. This is why we ask for a credit card at check in, not a debit card. I will most times not send a fax to your bank telling them to release the funds, ESPECIALLY if you have accused us of stealing your money. We just assume you are an idiot.



19. If you get blood or vomit or urine or whatever on the towels or sheets, please ask for a garbage bag and bag them yourself. My housekeepers really really do not appreciate these messes. I do not let them handle linen that has bodily fluids on it because it is dangerous. They go directly from the bag into our huge washing machines and no one is contaminated. I do not let them bleed all over your room, please do them the same courtesy.



20. If you book an advanced purchase room, you will save a lot of money. IT CAN NOT BE CANCELLED. You receive this courtesy discount because you are guaranteeing you will be in the hotel on that date. We honestly don't care if Great Aunt Frida jumped off a bridge. That is not our fault.



21. If you want to know a really good secret, ask if the hotel is overbooked when you check in. We do something called "walking a room" which means we pay for your stay at another hotel that has space. We have to book you into a place of equal or greater value according to our standards. You get a free room, you help us save ourselves a lot of grief, and honestly, you may end up with a nicer room.



22. Book your room three weeks ahead of time. At least. THEN call the day before, before your cancellation window, and check the rates in town again. Sometimes we have to Fire Sell the rooms to get rid of them. You might just do better. Book the room under your wifes name, cancel yours and there ya go! $20 off. Nice huh?



23. ALWAYS become a member of that hotels loyalty program when you sign in. Gold Crown Club, Choice Privileges, Wyndham Rewards, Priority Club Rewards, Hilton Honors, etc. Ask at the desk for them to sign you up. We get a bonus for signing people up, and sometimes we will upgrade your room for free. A lot of times you will get free drinks, coupons, free bottled water or snack, a pass to a managers reception etc. Not to mention the fact that you earn points which add up to free nights or free stuff in the future.



24. If you have made yourself unwelcome at a hotel, don't try and stay there again. Especially if you have called our 1-800 to complain about something trivial. You cost us $150 in fees, and we will cancel your reservation. Honestly. I have a blacklist. Not only that, but when I kick you out of my hotel for being a jerk, I am going to call all of the other hotels in the area, and they wont rent to you either. I will give them your description and tag number and the staff will be on alert to not rent to you. I really do know the managers of all the other hotels, and we hang out together. Not to mention the fact that the owners of my hotel, probably are friends with, or already own the hotel down the street. Its not really that competitive of a market when you get down to it, because we help each other out a lot.



25. If your secretary books your room incorrectly, dont yell at my staff. The problem is not within our company, its within yours.



26. Don't smoke in a non-smoking room. I really do charge that $300 smoking fee and you won't get that money back.



27. If you have a dog you are bringing on vacation, DO NOT leave them alone in the room all day. They will wreck the room, no matter how good they are at home. If you offer the agent at the desk $20 to dog sit, they will almost always let you keep the dog behind the desk with its food and water, take the dog for a walk a few times on their breaks, and actually give the dog attention. We will charge you if the dog wrecks the room. It's worth the $20. Trust me. If your dog is psychotic, BOARD IT. I have been bitten quite a few times. I am an animal lover, but trust me, eventually its going to be a severe enough bite and someone is going to get sued because I had to go and snatch a dog out of a room because it was bothering our other guests. If your dog bites me, we will have a problem.



BE NICE and you will almost always get your way. Don't freak out because you did not get new shampoo. That does not deserve a $20 discount. I am going to look at you like you are crazy and hand you five little bottles of shampoo and send you on your merry way. And then I will blacklist you.r

I'm Impressed

This morning I had an appointment for a diagnostic test at our new hospital here in Port St Joe.  From the moment I entered, I was treated with courtesy, respect and personal attention.


Now I have a rather checkered medical past and have had occasion to need hospitals up & down the east coast, as well as in a 3rd world country called Louisiana.  My experierence today was a shock to my system.  I'll explain.

When I entered, the volunteer at the front desk smiled and greeted me pleasantly then personally led me to the main check-in desk.  A friendly smiling face took the essential information, then escorted me to a private cubicle for processing.  Actual check in took about 15 minutes because of the mounds of paperwork involved in absolving hospitals of any misdeeds.  However, I was spoken with as if I was a real person and not just an annoying interuption in said paperwork.

After being processed, the clerk  personally escorted me to the radiology lab waiting area & wished me well.  After a brief 5 minute wait, a young tech greeted me with his name and shook my hand.  He offered information, privacy and again, talked with me as if I was a reasonably intelligent co-inhabitant of the planet.  I was impressed.

When the testing was complete, this delightful young man personally walked me out to the lobby and wished that we'd see each other again, but under different circumstances.

I have never had such a positive medical experience and the next time I feel like I need a little love, I'm heading for my little hospital.  Thanks to all of you or ya'll as we say here in L A. 

Spry???

At my family gathering in NJ a couple of weekends ago,  my oldest grandson, somewhere in the 21 year old category, greeted me with, " Wow, Gramichele you look so good and spry."  Spry?  Spry?  I hate that description of me.  I see a spry  woman as one in her eighties, nineties, etc. dancing on "Dancing With The Stars." What the hell, was he wanting me to do a couple of cartwheels?

Actually, Cloris Leachman would also be offended by being described as spry.  It's a crappy adjective. It's right up there with younger people calling us "young lady."  Don't start me on that one. Ending that particular condescending title is my personal crusade.

We all have a picture of ourselves in our minds and we tend to think others percieve us as we see ourselves.  That is so not true.  I want to be seen as hip, smart, loving, pretty good looking for my age, but damnit, not spry nor a young lady. I'm an old lady and pretty proud that I've made it this far & with my essentials still intact.  I want the respect I've earned. Don't use words or phrases that categorize and demean me  like "spry or young lady."  I will think less of you.

Almost a Mogul

Nah not quite. I’ve been watching foreclosures in my little town for quite a while now. It’s a good time to invest in real estate. Well, a few weeks ago, I saw a Fannie Mae foreclosure at a great price and the interior photos were very surprising. So, I made an appointment with the realtor and went to see it. It was move in ready except for needing a back deck and minor repairs. When I asked about price flexibility, the agent told me it was going to auction.



Hmmm. I’ve bought some things at auction, including my car, but jeez, a whole house is a big deal. I registered for the auction, but choked when the live auction began. I made an opening bid, then froze. First time jitters I guess. What a cowardly fool I was. This house went for $34,000 in a neighborhood of $115000 to #125000 previously sold properties.


On the up side, I learned a lot, am still registered for home auctions & next time I’ll have more confidence in myself.


What I want to pass on is what I learned about the Fannie Mae Homepath program. They do not favor investors. Their purpose is to bring owner/occupiers into established neighborhoods. If you are an owner /occupier, you can put 3% down, no PMI, no appraisal costs. For the first 15 days of the listing, investors may not bid.


We all know people who need housing at reasonable cost and I just want to pass on info for this wonderful opportunity for buyers. If you know someone who could benefit from this program, just send them to the Fannie Mae Homepath website.

Me vs. Rental Car

My friend the Ho is having car problems, which makes me think about my own transportation issues. My weekend visit to New Jersey involved a rental car. Hey, I’ve been driving for over 50 years. I can handle anything, right? Then why did I turn on the windshield washers 17 times before I got out of center city Philadelphia? I’m the first to admit that my eye-hand coordination leaves something to be desired, but damn, just ask my passenger, the DD. I just couldn’t get the whole shifter on the console thing. She would also mention that getting used to the sensitivity of the brakes was another learning experience.



I hated that car. For one thing, it was too close to the ground. I’m a tall girl & I need a tall girl’s car. I drive a totally uncool minivan & I like it. It’s old, the headliner hangs down in front of my face, the engine light is always on, but it starts up every time. The day it doesn’t start up when I need it to is the day I drop that sucker like the junker it is.


One reason I’ll hold on to it until the last mile is that I absolutely cannot deal with automobile salesmen or women. That’s a process I don’t understand. I’m too straightforward to play the game. They piss me off & I piss them off. My current junker I bought on Ebay. Lots of research and a trip to North Carolina to pick it up & et voila, I had wheels I was happy with. No mess, no fuss.


I wish good luck to the Ho & I wish my minivan with only 80,000 miles on it lasts another 50,000 at least.

Happy As A Lark

That's how someone who saw me this past weekend at my high school reunion described how I appeared to them and it couln't have been more true. 

This was a weekend to treasure for many years to come and for many reasons.  My family members who could make it shared with me lots of hugs ,plenty of laughs, great conversation,  and most of all, love.

From left to right, top row:  son in law Ely, moi, son Nick, brother Stephen,  middle row:  daughters Danielle & Denise, sister in law Paddy, daughter in law Nicole and on the couch:  grandson Zach, nephew Conlan, grandchildren Logan, Alexandra, Evan & my surprise gift for the weekend, grandaughter Chelsea Rose who I was told, couldn't make it back to SJ from her first week at Montclair U.

I'm feeling pretty lucky, and when I look at this photo, yep, happy as a lark.

Note To Connie

At my high school class reunion last weekend, I was approached by a former classmate, Connie, telling me she had a bet with her sister that I had been Miss New Jersey. Her sister bet her an expensive dinner out that I was not. Sister wins, I was 3rd runner up. I felt I disappointed Connie, so I may as well disappoint a few more people.


Helen Garr, an upperclassman, majorette and Miss Atlantic County was my idol. I wanted to be just like her so I joined her sorority, became a majorette and wanted to win Miss Atlantic County. It was all about winning for me. The actual being……not so much. For about a week afterwards I was like Mel Brooks. “It’s great to be the queen.”


Once I realized I’d have to follow through with public appearances, the bloom was off the rose. I was still at Trenton State at the time, so I’d have to drive all the way back to South Jersey, probably missing some great weekend party, doll myself up & be some place I didn’t want to be. I’m essentially a lazy person. I’ll work hard when I have to but I never stand when I can sit and I never sit when I can lie down. Neither do I like being told what to do and where to be. But for a year they were the boss of me. Hated it. Parades were the exception. It’s really fun to be in a parade & I still tear up when I hear a marching band.


By the time the Miss New Jersey pageant rolled around, I knew I didn’t want to actually be the queen, but I did want to win the title and so I gave it my best effort. I felt pretty good about being 3rd runner up, even if I did despise the bitch who won. My actually winning could have been a tad problematic because unbeknownst to me I was a teensy weensy itsy bit pregnant.

PHS Class of 1960, Our 50th

My 50th high school class reunion was everything I hoped it would be. My only regret was not having enough time to spend with old friends. My classmates have grown with their life experiences into seasoned adults with stories to tell.  Reading their personal comments in our souvenir booklet made me want to talk with each of them and find out more.



We danced, we laughed and we used our two short nights together to reconnect and catch up as best as we could. There was a lot of love in that room. Even though our time together felt short, I’m sure I’m not the only one who couldn’t have partied one more day.


For me it was a five day whirlwind. Amtrak travel is relaxing, but it’s still travel and that took up two days. My DD was my travel companion, and when the granddaughter texted wanting to know what it was like, the DD said, “Go into your closet, put two chairs facing each other and close the door.” She exaggerated, we had a window. Confession: years ago on my first overnighter in a sleeper car, I did a pressed ham as we passed a crossing with a line of waiting cars. Don’t tell anyone though.


Doing the whole glam thing was also a tad stressful. It’s been ten years, our last reunion, since I’ve done the whole nine yards. Around here, I slap on a little makeup when the Ho & I go to lunch once a month. My hair hasn’t been out of a pony tail since last winter. In Florida, wearing hair down feels like wearing a hair hat. NG for heat in the high 90’s. While I was getting ready for Saturday night, the condo was filled with my children and grandchildren. They were shocked when I emerged as glam gran. I told them that just because I don’t do it, doesn’t mean I don’t remember how.


With any luck, I’ll be able to do it again. Ten years is a bit optimistic at our age, so I’m hoping for five and will be looking forward to it.

Puzzled and Saddened

Yes, I'm puzzled and saddened by a diatribe/resume published in our 50th high school class reunion souvenir booklet.  It was written by a former classmate who signs himself "...in all humility,"
His Name, PhD, DMH, MBA, BBA, CEO, PDJ, Inc., Vice President, Senior Class of 1960

He begins his diatribe by insulting the school, then continues on by insulting his former classmates as well. A few direct quotes:  "Many people can remember teachers berating non-conforming students through lackluster courses taught by authoritarians."  "If one part of the scenario was the teacher, the second part was our own indolence, laziness and hormonal imbalance."  I say, speak for yourself, pal.

He goes on in this vein for 6 printed pages.  Yes, 6. The latter half is devoted to his own accomplishments peppered with the names of every prominent person he has ever encountered as well as quotes from the likes of Gen. Eisenhower, Thomas Wolfe (whose name he misspelled)  and Kipling.  Is he assuming that this is the first time we've heard these?  I get the feeling he considers himself the only truly educated and enlightened person from our class.

He did not attend our reunion this past weekend because and I quote, "I believe my schedule won't accommodate the reunion date." He did however, hope we all had a wonderful time.  I remember him as a pretty nice guy.  Maybe a little bit of a pompous ass back then, but it now seems that he's a bitter, judgemental, namedropping pompous ass with a superiority complex. 

Jersey Girl Back In Florida

Just got back from an exceptional trip to my 50th high school class reunion plus a fabulous get together with my family.  I got in late this afternoon, so as soon as I detox, I'll be chronicling the highlights with a rant or two thrown in.  I'm pretty sure I'll be doing 3 installments.  My major regret is that my camera malfunctioned & I am photoless.  What a bummer.

Refusing Martyrdom

The Ho sent me this birthday card on the condition that when her birthday comes around again I will tell her she also looks fabulous.

No Lie.  We both look fabulous.

I've spent most of my adulthood perfecting the role of martyr.  No more.  I'm done.  The DH has a meeting he can't miss tomorrow night, so he doesn't want to join me in celebrating my birthday.

No problem.  I'll leave here after work, drive to Sam's club in PC, buy myself a pair of outrageously priced Maine lobster tails.  I have a 1 PM manicure appt, after which I'll stop at the El Governor Beach Bar in Mexico Beach for a cocktail before heading back to say so long to the DH.  It should be a slow night at the motel, so I can cook and savor my lobster without interruption. 

It's going to be a great day.  Lesson for the day:  you are the only person responsible for your own happiness. 

Welcome To The Neighborhood

My dear friends Ed & Bill moved from Hammonton, NJ to Atlanta, Ga and I took a quick run up there the other day.  Bill has accepted a very prestigious position at Emory University.  They're only 5 1/2 hours away so I'm thrilled that they're now in the neighborhood.  My ride to Atlanta was very pleasant until while passing the airport a 747 damn near took the roof off my car.  Until you've driven I 85/75 through Atlanta you've not experienced extreme driving.  I used to think the Schuykill Expressway outside of Philly was the kamakazi strip.  Close, but no cigar.  Not even a cigarillo.  

Their new home is on a lovely street with mature trees and landscaping.  The house itself in today's terminology is "mid century modern." The floorplan is ideal and there's a full basement with wet bar and full bath.  It would easily fit a pool table and full size shuffleboard table.  Oh dear, here I go making it my own.  Down girl.  Oh, and there's a 50 ft. magnolia in the front yard.  I should have taken pictures.  Next time.

I love Ed & Bill dearly, but I'm "in love" with Benny.  Benny is a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel and the darlingest dog ever.  He's gorgeous, he's loving and I wanted to steal him. Look at that face!  My research tells me that this is not a dog to leave in a doggy hotel.  He wants to be with his family all the time, so I'm going to have to wait until we're living in an RV so when I get my own Benny he can go everywhere with us.

I May Get To Europe Yet

I don't fly, I don't cruise.  I do cars and trains ( and under duress buses.) One of my most memorable bus trips was to Miami with my Gram & Pop when I was 15 years old, but that's a whole other story.

However, perhaps in my lifetime (doubtful)  the proposed transatlantic tunnel will become a reality.  It's only 3,100 miles and equipped with a 5000 mph train, I could be sitting in a London pub in an hour.  Hello....That's for me.   I'll pack my scuba gear,  just in case.

Even more intriquing is the proposed Bering Strait bridge.  It's only 50 miles folks!  Drive to Siberia.  Think about it.  I might do that too.  I could meet all the HOG game creaters and tell them all the real names of stuff they might find in America. 

Miss Universe Nudity

The oddsmakers are favoring Miss Ireland to take it tonight.  Wouldn't that be a refreshing change?  As always, I will be watching and critiquing.  I'm a terrific home judge and enjoy the process immensely.

But the big flap is over contestants being photographed having their bodies artfully airbrushed.  Give me a friggin' break.  Is a tit or two offensive?  Especially an 18 to 23 year old tit.

Cloris Leachman had airbrushed body art done at age 70 and the photos were published in Vogue.  There are body artists all over the country and many competitions featuring semi-nude female bodies of all ages.  Their work can be awesome.  The subject wears a thong gstring and the body is used as a canvas.  I personally am planning to treat myself to a full body art airbrushing for my own 70th birthday.  Anyone care to join me?  Maybe we can get a group discount. 

Bare Chested In Public, Yes or No

Don't I wish

Even so, I'm pretty turned off by any man, even those with obvious assets parading around outside my motel with their bare chests ( & fat guts) hanging out.  It just seems ignorant, classless and insensitive to other people's feelings.

Right now, one guy is sitting shirtless outside room #11.  Is he going to deter drive in business from staying here?  I have to say yes. 

This weekend a middle aged father and his 20 something son actually took showers using the hose out in our front yard.  For all to see, they shoved the hose down the front of their pants and then flushed their rears while massaging the sand out of their butts.  Good thing I was no-vacancy at that point, because any normal folks driving by would just keep on going.  I'm assuming, of course, that there are normal people out there.

It's hot as hell here & I understand that men are suffering with the heat. We women are suffering with the same heat, but my housekeeper & I don't walk around outside with our less than prime boobs hanging out. Give us a break guys.  I vote NO.

Rules are Rules?

I don't rent to locals.  I don't want to deal with domestic disputes, drug deals or have the bank VP and his secretary stop by for a nooner.  I flat out will not be that kind of place. 

However...tonight a sweet local family with 2 school age children needed one of my rooms because they couldn't pay their electric bill and won't have the air turned back on until tomorrow afternoon.  How could I say no?  It's 100 degrees out there.  Am I a sucker?  We'll see.

Speaking of suckers, a few  years ago, I had a housekeeper to whom I told that the only way I would rent a room to a local would be if their house burned down.  I was out one day and the DH rented a room to a girl who told him her house burned down, her car died and she had no where else to go.

Turns out, she was my housekeepers sister in law, who knew exactly what to say.  She trashed the room, & ripped out the window screen so she could blow her crack outside.

Is It Fall Yet?

I noticed the difference as soon as I opened my eyes this morning.  The quality of light seeping into my consciousness was purer somehow.  When I went out to get the paper, there was a clarity to the air which I haven't seen in many months.  Granted, it was subtle, but throughout the day my brain kept registering sharper images.  Late this afternoon, while coming out of the laundry room, I was absolutely positive I saw fall.  That's Fall with a capital F.

What's A Nose Anyway?

Will I cut off my nose to spite my face?  You're damn skippy I will if it's for a noble cause and the greater good.

Wanting to try a new pasta salad recipe, I cooked a pound of rotini last night so I wouldn't steam up my kitchen in the heat of the day.  I put it in a covered plastic bowl in the very back of my fridge.

When I walked into the kitchen this morning there was a suspicious looking dirty dish lurking in the sink.  Recognizing the dregs of olive oil and garlic sent me to the fridge to check on my pasta.  The bowl I'd hidden in the very back was now up front and half empty. I was not happy, but thinking I'll just have to make a smaller batch, but when the OP I live with got up and I mentioned the missing pasta, he actually said "You should have put I sign on it."  Well, something in me just snapped   "I SHOULD HAVE PUT A SIGN ON IT!!  A SIGN ON IT!  I'LL SHOW YOU A SIGN, " I said with clenched teeth as I upended the remaining pasta into the dumpster.

Your Time Or My Time

Dammit!  I missed my red hat luncheon yesterday.  You'd think that after over 8 !/2 years of living at the convergence of 2 time zones I'd have it figured out by now.  I'm surrounded by central time.  6 miles to the west and 10 miles to the north.  Eastern time only runs along the coast.  At one time, a very influential company owned a paper mill here in PSJ and wanted it on the same time schedule as their corporate offices in Atlanta.  What they wanted, they got.  The paper mill is long gone, but those of us who live here still deal with the anomaly of two time zones.

The situation does have it's advantages.  If I have a 1PM appt. with my hairdresser, I can leave here at 1:40 PM and be on time.  If I'm going to PC, I can leave here at 10 AM and arrive there after an hour's drive at 10 AM. 

This time, I guess I just had a brain fart. I won't admit that it could be age, but will consider that the ongoing  heat has burned my brain matter into charbroil. The email from the Red Hat Queen Mum did say lunch at 12 in PC and my mind just didn't compute.  I drove an hour to have lunch with friends and ended up eating Burger King by myself.  PS.  These girls don't linger, they eat and run.

Scary Kid

From my desk I  see 2 SUV's drive up to the office , each with Texas plates, 2 adults plus 2 children in each vehicle. The first one in the door is a boy around 10 yrs old, followed by a couple of adults, then the contents of the other vehicle.  The kid slams the lobby door shut on the woman following him, but she pushes in anyway. She says nothing to the kid.   I now have 4 adults and a couple of children crammed in my tiny lobby, with the 10 yr old boy right up front at the desk.  I ask how many people and how many nights.  They tell me 8 people, 1 night.  The kid looks me dead in the eyes and says in utter seriousness, "I. Own. This. Place."  The parents say nothing.   As I stare him down, I'm thinking "holy crap" and instantly go from 4 vacant rooms to one.  " Gosh folks, I'm so sorry, I only have one room left, maximum 4 people.  I can't accommodate your group, but in which direction are you going, perhaps I can suggest another motel."  I'm going to sic this scary kid and his bizarre family on another motel down the road.  The further down the road the better. 

To Profile Or Not To Profile

Guest #1:  This guy gave me the creeps right off the bat.  I despise it when men walk into public places shirtless.  This one came into the office not only shirtless, but with half a section of chain link fence hanging from his left nipple.  Body piercing is a personal choice, but along with the bare chest, I don't need to see it.  For 2 days, housekeeping couldn't get into his room because he never left it.  As much as I hated to, I agreed to give him another room for a week starting Sunday evening.  I couldn't think of a legitimate reason to refuse him.  At check out today, he wouldn't get out of the room, so I went right in and started stripping beds.  I finally shooed him out to sit in front & wait for his ride.  He had no vehicle of his own.  In his last minute packing he neglected to pick up the freshly rolled joint from the kitchen table.  It smelled like good stuff, so I wasn't about to give it back to him.   I took it in to the DH.  Thinking this would be reason enough to refuse to honor his next reservation, the DH went out and confronted him.  The guy actually said  "That doesn't belong to me...what is it?"  Again, no proof.  What clinched it was the half smoked roach we found hidden under the alarm clock.  While I have no objection to a little recreational smoke now and then, I do object to the damage caused by high, stupid guests.  They have a tendency to burn stuff and the motel is underinsured.

Guest #2:  This was a good looking young man in his 20's.  He came in to inquire about prices and availability wearing some way cool shades and a Crocodile Dundee hat I'm sure he thought was way cool.  While discussing rates, he felt compelled to tell me that he was wrapping up a real estate deal in the pacific northwest and that would free up some funds.  He said this with a straight face.  I hid my smile, since  I heard, "I'm broke and need a cheap place to stay."

Guest #3:  Reservation # 4386 showed up wearing full african regalia.  The dashiki, the hats, the whole (equivilant of) enchilada (in swahili.)  Very refined, very well spoken couple.  This morning I get a call from the gentleman asking if he could make a long distance call from his room.  When I said no, he launched into a long unnecessary story about how he bought a prepaid cell phone & it wasn't working.  He was beginning to get frantic and begged to come to the office and pay me to make a long distance call from my phone because he had to check in with his  parole officer.

Company's Coming

I'm stressing out a tad because I love to provide at least one personally prepared meal when company comes to visit.  On Wednesday, Danny Jr,  wife Colleen and girls, Zaria and Keira will be arriving for a couple of days.  The day they leave, daughter Danielle & family arrive.  What I'm doing is planning meals for one family that will segue to the next family.  I have 5 racks of babybacks, dry rubbed and ready to put on outside to slow cook.  We can't cook in my tiny kitchen with heat like we've been experiencing and still be able to sit in there to eat.  Way too hot.

I'll bake potatos at night for my "loaded baked potato salad." Double the recipe. My segue meal will be a fajita pasta salad.  I'm elaborating on a couple of "mexican pasta salad" recipes I found with my own sliced steak addition. 

I've been perfecting my mango cream cake for a couple of months now, so if I can find some good mangoes and can turn my oven on without roasting myself as well,  I'll include it too.
If I cook one day, I feel comfortable ordering out or going out on the others.  With careful planning I can really enjoy company during this very busy time of year.

While writing this, I got a call from a frequent guest who's coming in tomorrow night.  He told me he's bringing me goodies from his garden and asked if he should include okra.  I hesitated for a moment hoping I wouldn't hurt his feelings and then suggested he leave the okra at home.  He laughed, so I guess we're still friends.

Rerant

I know I've addressed this issue before, but it happened several times today. Why do absolute (note that I didn't say "perfect" strangers) strangers start a conversation by asking how I am?  I don't want to discuss my well being with strangers, and it's none of their business anyway.  In my more perverse moments I want to reply, "well my leprosy isn't quite as contagious as it was." The weird thing is, they expect me to ask how they are back.  Trust me, unless your're a friend or a relative, I don't care. 

This morning, one male caller compounded the issue by actually  saying, "How are you, young lady."  Young lady!!!  Did I sound like I was 12 years old or was he being the insulting, condescending jerk I suspected he was.  All he wanted to know was if I had a vacancy and how much it would cost.  Jeez, that's not hard.  Just say,  "hello,  do you have a room tonight and how much is it for 2 people?"  My yankee directness and my aversion to bullshit just doesn't seem to fit in here in lower Alabama, oops the Florida panhandle.

bitchspeak

This morning a woman guest came into the office for coffee, we chatted for a moment, and then she said, "By the way, the ceiling fan in my room isn't working.  Would you get it fixed while we're out, because I'm claustrophobic and need the circulation or I can't sleep.  If not, can you move us to another room?  I'll check back with you later."  After she assured me that her air conditioning unit was working well, I said we had no other rooms available, but would look into the fan issue.  When we cleaned the room, I saw that someone had torn off the fan pull chain and that's not a quick fix, so I left her a note on my personal stationary saying, "Thank you for alerting us that a previous guest has broken the ceiling fan.  We will be replacing the fan with a standard light fixture."

Now let me translate this entire conversation into bitchspeak.  "Your rooms are so damn small, I can't breathe and if the fan isn't fixed we may want our money back for tonight."  "Oh, yeah?  well screw you."

Wishful Thinking

In the last 45 minutes, I've had 6 mothers calling to try and reserve rooms for their deadbeat sons who got temp jobs training for oil spill clean up. This being July 4th weekend, I can only accommodate a few of them for a night or two.   I feel for these parents and can picture them while talking with me, down on their knees praying.  "Please let this job work out for this kid and let me get my life back.,"  I already have 2 men in their 30's in rooms which I had to charge to their parent's credit card.  Is that pathetic?  Only one of the mothers told me her son was under 21.  The rest were men???

On that same note, one of our Red Hat ladies, 72 years old, trained for beach oil clean up.  "Hey", she said, "the pay is $18 per hour and I work 1/2 hour on and 15 minutes off.  I can do that!"

Looking A Gift Horse In The Mouth

Some lovely guests checking in tonight brought me a whole bag of corn on the cob from Georgia.
That was such a nice thing for them to do.  There's only one problem, it was frozen solid.  Mortal sin!!!!!  Sacrilege!!!!!!!  Those of us from New Jersey know that corn must be eaten the same day as picked.  I remember my uncle, Big Dan, driving all the way from Ventnor to Somers Point to get his farm fresh corn.  We Garden Staters have been so spoiled and we won't settle for second best.

There's another guest who brings us steaks and ground beef from his own steers.  He has a cattle ranch and butchers one steer a year for personal use.  A lot of folks don't know that Florida is cattle country.  A lot of prime beef is raised here and I'm grateful to Keith and Betty for being so generous to us.  We had the T bones a few nights ago & they were awesome.

What Eats Rid X???

There's a Rid X eating critter living in my laundry room.  It actually cleaned out the area under the floor where the ramp connects the two sections of the laundry.  Every morning there would be another pile of detritus next to the opening.  Today it was a pretty small pile, so I guess nest cleaning is about done.  This thing also drags a pretty good sized box of roach traps from the back of the laundry up toward the front.  The box is riddled with bite marks. So  whatever eats Rid X and is going after roach bait has some decent size sharp teeth. 

But Who's Counting?

It was 85 degrees at 8 AM when I started work outside this morning.  It's almost 100 in the shade now.  Shegundala had a prior commitment, so  I had to fly solo today turning over 7 rooms and making up 2 stays.  That tallied out to making 17 beds, schlepping dirty towels and linens to the laundry and schlepping the clean ones back to 9 rooms, loading, unloading and folding 8 loads of sheets and towels, sanitizing  bathrooms, emptying trash, replacing amenities, mopping, vacuuming and surface cleaning 9 rooms.  This old broad is hurtin'. 

Copy Of Letter Sent Today

On Dixie Belle letterhead, this letter was mailed out today.

Mr.  (Ignorant Frickin' Jackass),

In reference to your stay here at the Dixie Belle Motel with your lady friend on Wednesday, June 9, consider this a bill for damages incurred.

You and your lady friend smoked in a non smoking room.  The fee for violation of the smoking policy is clearly stated on a notice posted in the room.

We will overlook the fact that you disconnected the smoke alarm, putting the entire building and every guest in danger, and that you urinated in the bedding.

We will however, expect your payment of the stated fee of $250.00 for violation of the non smoking policy.

Sincerely,


Blah, Blah, Blah
Owner

We know we'll never see a dime.  We just hope his wife opens the letter.

At Least I Got To Meet Marvin

Had an early Dr. appt in Panama City, then did a litle shopping.  At my Winn Dixie stop, I picked up a sandwich at the deli & was sitting in my car in the parking lot, reading a magazine when 2 little girls knocked on the passenger side window.  I thought they might be selling girl scout cookies, so I lowered the window.  " Your car is leaking gas," one said.  "Yeah, said the other, a lot of gas."  I semi-panicked since I was 30 miles from home.  I threw my sandwich in the trash & floored it to the nearest gas station/convenience store.  The 3 mile trip used up 1/8 tank of gas, so I knew I was in trouble.

As I pulled up to the gas pump, whoooosh....the remaining gas just poured out onto the ground.  In ten seconds the tank was too dry to even turn the engine over.  Since Verizon service is so bad, I've stopped carrying my cell phone and had to borrow one from a clerk at the convenience store.  I called my AARP Motoring Plan.  First they tried to get me to agree to a tow to a Pep Boys 9 miles west.  I live 26 miles east.  Apparently the Pep Boys would give me a 10 % discount as well as kick back to the Motor Club. 

"Sorry kid, nice try, but you're going to have to find someone more gullible.  I want to be towed to Lee's in Port St Joe, where I happen to live."  Over an hour later Marvin from Spud Bubba Wrecking Service shows up.  Marvin was a sweet guy.  He talked the entire 26 mile trip to PSJ.  I know what his last 2 electric bills were, where he likes to take a shower and that one of his 6 cats got sick with a stomach full of pus.  Green pus. 

Not As Dumb As They Look

I have been outsmarted by a couple of oversized, overalled yahoos from the hills of Tennessee.  Even though I'm certainly not a good loser, I have to give credit where credit is due.

Actually, there are four huge men, sharing a small room with 2 beds.  Their luggage (a huge Rubbermaid tub for each man) is piled high.  The first night of their stay they pulled the curtains off the windows, and messed up the bath towels.  When they came to us asking to extend their stay by one night, we told them there was nothing available.  Yep, liar, liar, pants on fire.  I didn't feel one bit guilty though and the next day when they asked again, I looked the guy right in the eye & still denied having a vacancy available for them.

I've always thought my bullshitting skills were better than average, but he must have seen through me because....he had his wife call the office pretending to be a new customer, and booked a room for the extra night.  He caught me in the laundry room early this morning & asked when they could move into their new room.  I'f my teeth weren't all mine, I would have dropped them when he told me what they did.  Checkmate!

One Girl Too Many

It looks like this sonofabitch is finally going to get his comeuppance. So tragic that another young woman had to die first.

Natalee Holloway's mother is staying quiet for the moment.  She's afraid to jinx the investigation and she's afraid to get her hopes up after spending years living with the knowledge that this lowlife was responsible for her daughter's disappearance.